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'You're doing it. Worthy or not'

By Darcy L. Fargo

Darcy Fargo

July 17, 2019

I tried to get out of doing it.

When I was hired for this job, I actually asked if writing this column was optional. I didn’t want to do it. Much to my dismay, I was told it’s required as part of my duties.

Even now, if someone approaches me and comments on my column, I note that it’s my least favorite part of my job; the part I struggle with most.

Why? I could say it’s because it’s hard to come up with fresh content every week (or every other week in summer). I could say it’s because, before this job, I had minimal experience writing in the first person. Those are both factors in why writing this column is difficult, but it’s not the big reason I struggle.

I struggle because I don’t feel qualified to offer insights about trying to be a disciple of Christ when – due to my sinfulness, doubts and personality defects – I fail so regularly at it. I don’t feel worthy.

One day, I relayed this struggle and these feelings of unworthiness to a wise priest. His response?

“Yet here you are. You answered the call, and you’re doing it. Worthy or not.”

I thought of that as I watched more than 60 people from around the diocese become commissioned as lay ministers.

These are people who answered when God called them to serve Him and their parishes in particular ways.

I know a few of the people who were commissioned. They’re outstanding people; people who live their lives in ways that reflect Christ to others, but none of them are perfect. They have their struggles, their doubts and their sins. Yet here they are, answering God’s call. Worthy or not.

It struck me that we have a God who is so amazing, He can do amazing things through even broken and struggling people. It struck me that despite that, it’s so easy to hear God’s call and say, “me, Lord? It can’t be. I’m not smart enough. I’m not talented enough. I’m not good enough. I’m simply not enough.”

Thank you, commissioned lay ministers, for answering God’s call. Thank you for serving God and your communities.

And thank you for reminding me that we’re all called to say “yes” to the Lord when we’re called, not when we feel worthy of it.

May God bless you and your ministries.

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