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Given a complement

By Darcy L. Fargo

Darcy Fargo

February 8, 2023

I say it almost every time someone asks about my husband.

“Adam is the anti-me. I’ll talk to anyone and everyone. You could meet him 20 times, and he’d still only say five words to you.”

Almost universally, the response is, “opposites attract.”

I don’t like to think of us as “opposites.” That word feels somewhat adversarial to me. I prefer to say, “we complement each other.”

I hate driving on winter roads. Adam doesn’t mind it, so he drives in those conditions. He hates driving in cities or unfamiliar places. I don’t mind that, so I handle that kind of driving. Adam’s not so great at managing schedules and the more administrative part of running a household, so I handle most of that. I’m no good at fixing things or building, so he takes care of those tasks. Adam is methodical and deliberate in making decisions, which balances out my tendency to be impulsive and adventurous.

Oxford Languages defines “complement” as “add to (something) in a way that enhances or improves it; make perfect.”

Adam’s not perfect. I’m not perfect. When we put our skills, talents and personalities together, though, there’s not much we can’t do, but we’re still not perfect. Similarly, our marriage isn’t perfect.

Despite our imperfections, we’re trying to do what our Lord calls us to do, and we’re trying to help each other get to heaven.

We’re using our imperfect love to work together to get to perfect love, to become complete. It fits the definition of “complement” pretty well.

That’s also worth talking about almost every time someone asks about my husband.

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