October 21, 2026 While I pray the words every week, sometimes every day, I don’t particularly like them. The words: “forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who trespass against us.” If that’s the standard, if we’re forgiven only as much as we forgive others, I’m in trouble. I realized recently that while I’m often pretty good at forgiving people, I’m awful at forgiving people consistently and repeatedly. Example: A few years ago, someone I love wounded me deeply and intentionally. If I was asked about that situation every day for 10 days, for nine of those days, I’d probably say something like “I forgive the person involved, I pray for that person nearly every day, and I wish that person well.” But the tenth day is different. Maybe on that tenth day, something made me think of the incident. Maybe something made me think of the relationship I had with that person, someone who is no longer part of my everyday life. Maybe nothing happened at all, but I’m in a bad mood. But on that tenth day, it’s certainly not forgiveness in my heart. The anger and hurt resurfaces. I may even wish I could get revenge on the person – I’m not always a good person. It’s like I set the pain and hurt down eleventy billion times only to pick it back up eleventy billion and one times. My conversations with others make me think I’m not the only person who does this. A lot of us, maybe most or all of us, struggle to forgive consistently and repeatedly. See why I don’t like those words? In addition to praying for that person nine out of 10 days, I pray almost every day for the grace to forgive completely – both in that situation and with the rest of the eleventy billion wounds I keep picking back up. I also trust that while God calls us to forgive others as He forgives us, He also forgives perfectly and wholly. I’m confident God doesn’t get mad at me again every 10 days or so for that time I skipped Mass without a good reason. I pray we all grow in our ability to put down pain and anger and leave them for good. I pray we can reflect Christ’s love in the world. Whether we like the words or not. |
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