June 17, 2026 I was missing from my own column. We hear about Artificial Intelligence (AI) everywhere these days, even in papal encyclicals. Writing is one of the tasks for which many people are using AI. Inspired by a dear friend, I thought it would be fun to see how AI would do writing a column for this space. I spent a week giving AI glimpses of my life. I asked ChatGPT questions and gave it information about my weightlifting, diet, swimming, travel plans, prayer life, favorite books and movies, short-term goals… basically everything I could think of except family (some things should stay private). Then, at the end of that week, I gave ChatGPT the link to the archive of my old columns and the prompt, “using the information you know about me and the samples here as a guide for style and tone, write me a column for this week.” In just a few seconds, text started appearing on the screen. ChatGPT wrote me a column about not having an idea for a column. While I’ve written a column on that topic before, it didn’t look like this version. In fact, I thoroughly disliked the AI column. First, it had lines I would absolutely never use. Example: “I used to think inspiration came first and effort followed. That the ‘good columns’ arrived fully formed, polished, ready to print.” I have never used “polished” to describe me or anything I’ve created. “Polished” is the opposite of who I am. I am far more likely to describe myself as “conductor of the Hot Mess Express.” But it was less about what AI said that made me dislike its version of my column and more about what it didn’t say. The AI column didn’t have any quirky phrasing at all – no “eleventy billion” or “conductor of the Hot Mess Express” or any other silly description. AI could include lots of details about me in the column, but it can’t put the actual me in the column. And that’s part of what Pope Leo talked about in Magnifica Humanitas – keeping the human element. “In the era of artificial intelligence, when human dignity is threatened by new forms of dehumanization, ours is the pressing duty to remain profoundly human,” he writes. “We must lovingly safeguard the grandeur of humanity bestowed upon us and revealed in its fullness in Christ, the splendor of which no machine can ever replace.” God made me and gave me a love of quirky descriptions and silly sayings. I think I’ll stick with that, and I’ll keep writing my own columns. |
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